Radishes

Today Bimla (my house help lady) told me that radishes are cheap these days. In fact, she bought 3 kilos for just 10 rupees (25 cents). She was planning to make her family some fried bread with radishes for dinner. But when she came home from working yesterday she found that her kids had eaten all the radishes raw. Now her youngest is throwing up radishes.

My visitors

My parents came to visit this past week, over Christmas. It was a wonderful time together. I am so glad they came to visit. I also love seeing India through a new person's eyes.

Jama Masjid, the biggest mosque in India, was one of our first stops. We all squished into an auto rickshaw and road to Old Delhi. Crowded, but a beautiful day.

Second trip was to Humayan's Tomb which is close to our house. I decided it would be a good experience for my dad to take a cycle rickshaw there. Thinking that for my mom it might not be good for her back, all the bumps. So I told the cycle driver where to take my dad and Micah. Then he went the opposite direction. So my mom and I drove to the tomb and waited and waited. Finally, we saw them walking towards us. It turns out, the cycle driver took them somewhere else and Micah told him it was wrong. So he took them back to the beginning place and they walked. At least my dad got to experience a cycle rickshaw.

The day after Christmas we went to the Taj Mahal, along with half of India. It should have been a clue when we tried to get train tickets and were told it was overbooked by 200. So we got to drive there. Another good experience. My parents are very impressed with Steve's driving.

Well the Taj was CROWDED. Like the worst day at Disney Land. The waiting line was 4 hours long just to get in. We ended up paying the fast-track price and didn't realize it meant being pushed to the front of the line in front of all the others who had been waiting. Once inside the gate we realized that there was no way we were going to get close to the Taj. So we looked at it from a nice distance. It was a river of people all around the Taj.

Thanks for visiting Dad and Mom!

Another fear

I remember something else, besides earthquakes and tsunamis, that I am afraid of. I have a fear of attacks at church and hotels. Of course that fear would be because of the attacks in Pakistan at a church and the attacks last year at the Taj Hotel in Bombay.

A few months ago while our pastor was preaching, there was loud commotion outside a door at the front of the gym (that is where we have church). In my mind I was figuring out the best action plan for the attack. I would fall to the ground and cover myself with the plastic chair. I realized that would give me absolutely no protection from bullets, but maybe they wouldn't notice me and wouldn't shoot me. It turned out to be nothing so I didn't have to go to the floor.

A couple weeks ago we had a visitor at our church that was at the church in Pakistan when it was attacked. He is now deaf in one ear because he was too close to a grenade that exploded. That brings my fear back into the forefront of my mind.

So the other thing that scares me is hotels. This week is our church's Christmas Eve service which is held at the Hyatt Hotel here. I remember last year, being just a couple of weeks after the horrible terrorist attack in Bombay, and how I was noticing the lack of security. I realized there are so many ways a person could get in to the hotel and shoot us all.

I am tempted not to go to the Christmas Eve service. Too much anxiety for me I think. But my parents will be here and I would like them to have a nice Christmas Eve, so we will probably go. I am sure I will again choose my seating wisely, maybe behind a pillar or something to block the bullets.

Train of Chaos

We just got back from a wedding in a village. It was a very interesting trip. An all night train ride that we got very little sleep on. It was loud. One gentlemen decided to get a newspaper around 4am and I guess he wanted to be a news broadcaster, so he read it out loud so we could all hear the news. Others played their radios or talked loudly. So we didn't sleep very well. We arrived and went to the wedding.

That night we got to sleep in a hotel. That was nicer, but also loud. The housekeeper washed dishes outside our room and talked with other workers during the night. Then the call to prayer at 5am was the loudest I had heard. And the guy who sang it must have just woken up. He was still clearing his throat as he sang.

Well the last night was also spent on the train. We waited at the platform until over the load speaker we were told to go to another platform. So our group rushed with all the other people, up the stairs, over the tracks, down the stairs, with all our luggage. When the train finally arrived we only had five minutes for people to get off and us to get on (along with 100's of others). So we ran to the spot where are car was but the doors were being held shut from inside. I guess they already had enough people. But all the other 100 people who were suppose to get on were panicking. So we pushed and shoved and someone finally opened the door. So people started fighting and yelling and shoving to get in. We thought we would be smart and just get in the next car and then make our way over to the correct one. But others were also smart and were doing the same thing.

Then the train blew its whistle. We weren't on yet. There was also no room to get on. So we were shoving people on. We were next when the train started to move. We pushed Micah on and then I had to get on. But still no room. So I was shoving and yelling with everyone else. Still Steve and our friend needed on. Some guy was panicking because his grandpa still was outside. He was leaning over us which causes us to lean out the train. No one was able to move and the train was still moving along slowly. Well someone eventually pulled the emergency cord and it stopped. Steve and our friend were able to push on, with one leg outside the train. Police came on with their guns and climbed over everyone.

We were still not anywhere near our seats and it didn't look too hopeful. I stood in the bathroom with an old beggar lady. There was a blind man sitting on the floor outside the bathroom and probably 20 people all bunched together. Micah was a little ahead of us with a friend standing between the two train cars. Well eventually Steve put our huge bag on his head and just started pushing his way through. We had to step on people's feet and their bags to make it to our seats.

So once we got to our spot I climbed up to the top bunk where I was safe. Next to us was the fight with the police and I didn't want to be in the middle of that. Micah got up with me. There were others already in our seats who apparently had waitlisted tickets, which means you just go wherever you can. People were still trying to get to their seats but had to literally climb on the sides like a monkey to get anywhere.

In our berth we had six bunks, three on each side. There were twelve people in all who squeezed together. I slept with Micah and a stranger sat at the end. He kept my feet warm. I didn't have a blanket or anything to keep me warm. Our bags were several berths away and we didn't want to even try to go anywhere. So that was a horrible night of tossing and turning and freezing.

Password

So what happens when your husband changes the password to your gmail account and doesn't tell you? The answer is, you can't blog. So all the many important thoughts I have had for the last couple of days have had to escape my memory and forever be lost.

SWEATER VESTS are my favorite! Here are two of my recent finds.

Contentment again

I just listened to another sermon on contentment. It was very "American". I really hate it when people say, "Look at what you have. You are blessed." Yes, we have food, clothing and a place to live. I know I am blessed. But it is not the things that I have that let me know I am blessed, it is knowing that God loves me and cares for me.

Anyway, I understand that the preacher is trying to help people to be thankful for what they have so that they will quit coveting what others have. Like I said before, I don't find myself coveting things, but I do covet what other people have. Like their position, their importance, their life. And that is why I want to learn about contentment. So I look at what I have and realize that I have a good life. That doesn't stop me from coveting. But when I can see God in what I have and see my life through His eyes, then I'm content.

Godliness with contentment is great gain.

Sometimes I want to flatten a tire

Yesterday we went to our friends' house to celebrate Thanksgiving. We had a wonderful meal together with another couple too. Your regular Thanksgiving food. We had parked close to their apartment since we had a lot of things to carry. I had wondered if our parking wasn't the best, but it looked like people could still get around. Apparently, I was wrong. Steve went outside to skateboard with the kids and some of the neighbors gave him a hard time for his parking job. So he moved the car.

We left our friends' house around 9PM to make the drive home. But as we walked up to the car I noticed that we had a flat tire. Then I noticed a note on the windshield. The note was complaining about the parking job and they used some bad words to let us know what they thought about it. So we immediately suspected that the same person probably let the air out of our tire. It was completely flat. Too bad. Steve had to change the tire while Micah and I went back in to wait at our friends' place.

I told our friend what happened and he went out to talk to the guard. Not that it will do any good, but I guess that is what you are suppose to do.

It is funny how when something like this happens that I get the urge for revenge. If I knew which car was the bad guy's car I would have been tempted to let the air out of their tire. Or scratch it with my keys. I wonder if it would really make me feel better. I wonder if the person who did it feels any better after writing the hate note.

In the end, we went home in bad moods. Why do we let things like this get to us? We had a great time with friends and had spent many hours with them that day, so why is it that it can all get ruined with a note and a flat tire.

Eid Mubarak

What is Eid al-Adha

At the end of the Hajj (annual pilgrimage to Mecca), Muslims throughout the world celebrate the holiday of Eid al-Adha (Festival of Sacrifice). In 2009, Eid al-Adha will begin on approximately November 27th, and will last for three days.

What does Eid al-Adha commemorate?

During the Hajj, Muslims remember and commemorate the trials and triumphs of the Prophet Abraham. The Qur'an describes Abraham as follows:

"Surely Abraham was an example, obedient to Allah, by nature upright, and he was not of the polytheists. He was grateful for Our bounties. We chose him and guided him unto a right path. We gave him good in this world, and in the next he will most surely be among the righteous." (Qur'an 16:120-121)

One of Abraham's main trials was to face the command of Allah to kill his only son. Upon hearing this command, he prepared to submit to Allah's will. When he was all prepared to do it, Allah revealed to him that his "sacrifice" had already been fulfilled. He had shown that his love for his Lord superceded all others, that he would lay down his own life or the lives of those dear to him in order to submit to God.

Why do Muslims sacrifice an animal on this day?

During the celebration of Eid al-Adha, Muslims commemorate and remember Abraham's trials, by themselves slaughtering an animal such as a sheep, camel, or goat. This action is very often misunderstood by those outside the faith.

Allah has given us power over animals and allowed us to eat meat, but only if we pronounce His name at the solemn act of taking life. Muslims slaughter animals in the same way throughout the year. By saying the name of Allah at the time of slaughter, we are reminded that life is sacred.

The meat from the sacrifice of Eid al-Adha is mostly given away to others. One-third is eaten by immediate family and relatives, one-third is given away to friends, and one-third is donated to the poor. The act symbolizes our willingness to give up things that are of benefit to us or close to our hearts, in order to follow Allah's commands. It also symbolizes our willingness to give up some of our own bounties, in order to strengthen ties of friendship and help those who are in need. We recognize that all blessings come from Allah, and we should open our hearts and share with others.

It is very important to understand that the sacrifice itself, as practiced by Muslims, has nothing to do with atoning for our sins or using the blood to wash ourselves from sin. This is a misunderstanding by those of previous generations: "It is not their meat nor their blood that reaches Allah; it is your piety that reaches Him." (Qur'an 22:37)

The symbolism is in the attitude - a willingness to make sacrifices in our lives in order to stay on the Straight Path. Each of us makes small sacrifices, giving up things that are fun or important to us. A true Muslim, one who submits his or herself completely to the Lord, is willing to follow Allah's commands completely and obediently. It is this strength of heart, purity in faith, and willing obedience that our Lord desires from us.

What else do Muslims do to celebrate the holiday?

On the first morning of Eid al-Adha, Muslims around the world attend morning prayers at their local mosques. Prayers are followed by visits with family and friends, and the exchange of greetings and gifts. At some point, members of the family will visit a local farm or otherwise will make arrangements for the slaughter of an animal. The meat is distributed during the days of the holiday or shortly thereafter.

Avoiding the Blues

I just finished listening to a great sermon on contentment called, "Avoiding the Blues". I have a goal to learn to be content. One of the ways I hope to achieve that goal is to learn more about contentment through studying scripture and listening to sermons. This sermon was mostly about being content with what we have, but it also touched on some of my issues of trusting that God's plan is best.

http://www.sermoncloud.com/sermons-about-contentment/?page=1

As I listened to the sermon I knitted a stocking cap. I am back to making hats as a winter hobby. This one turned out real nice.

One of the issues that comes up often at Christmas time at church is the whole Advent Conspiracy. The way I understand it is that we are suppose to give less to ourselves and our loved ones and give more to those in need. In theory this is a great idea and I would fully support it. But in practice, I think it is lame. What "we" end up doing is buying some toys for kids who come from a poor family. We give clothes and food too. But basically, how I see it, is that we are giving and teaching them to expect the kind of Christmas that we are learning to give up. All about the things. I understand that it is nice to give toys to kids. But seriously, have you seen how many toys even poor kids in America have? And then what really gets me is that next year, if they don't get chosen as a recipient of our kindness, their parents will give them what they can afford and their Christmas will be a disappointment because the one before they got some cool toys.

So in this sermon the pastor ends with talking about different opportunities to give. One is the shoebox ministry with Samaritans Purse that gives kids a shoebox full of useful items and a little book about the Gospel. I am a little more open to this idea, but even this is hard for me. In a poor society, each child does not need a box of crayons. One box is used for lots of kids. We don't need to be sending over a bunch of crap we get at the Dollar Store that will break in a week either. Again we are teaching them to want material possessions. Which reminds me of the movie "The God's Must Be Crazy". I am more than happy to give money to buy food for people or to help meet their other needs.

Then I started thinking about churches. This has really made me critical in the last few years, but when churches need to raise a bunch of money for their new building projects it goes totally against the teaching on contentment. Sure, there needs to be nice places for "seekers" to go that would attract them to church, but really, how important is the place we meet? Or like at my church, we have pastries and coffee provided after the service. Who needs those anyway? If you can't go without eating for a few hours then pack a snack. Think of all the money we use at church to make it comfortable. Wouldn't it be better to use that money to buy food for someone truly in need? And isn't that what God tells us to do anyway, to take care of widows and orphans?

So back to the sermon. I appreciated the pastor's teaching and it really made me think. I hope it also will teach me to learn contentment.

Disappointing Shower

I hadn't taken a shower for two days, so this morning after aerobics, I was really looking forward to getting clean. Our shower is a little different than American showers. We have a hot water heater in the bathroom that comes out of one tap. Then there is water that comes from the kitchen hot water heater that comes out of another tap. And a third tap has the city water, which is cold. The city water is not usually very strong. And usually the kitchen water heater is not on so it is cold. So usually I use the bathroom hot water, mixed with the kitchen cold water. It makes good water pressure that can rinse the shampoo out of my hair quite well.

I'm sure you can guess where this story is going, but here it is anyway. Today the bathroom hot water was very hot because we had the hot water heater on. Now when I say "very hot" I mean VERY HOT. It will burn you and not just on the sensitive areas. You HAVE TO have cold water to mix with it. Unfortunately the kitchen hot water heater was on for the dishes being washed. But it takes a few minutes for the water to get through the pipes, so at first it was cold. That lasted long enough for me to get shampoo in my hair. When I was going to rinse my hair, the water quickly turned to boiling, red hot water. So I quickly turned the water off. I tried to turn some cold, city water on, but it only was a trickle. There was no mixing possible. So instead I had to choose between third degree burns on my head or the trickle. I chose the trickle and rinsed my hair as best I could.

I'm thankful for hot water. For instance, last night we needed to fill a hot water bottle and we didn't even need to boil water to get it hot. Actually, I guess that is the only time that I can think of when the boiling hot tap water has come in handy. But I am thankful for water and the ability to heat it for my shower.

Beggars and me

In Delhi there are a lot of beggars and very poor people. The other day, two ladies came to the door to ask for money because someone was getting married. I said "no." They then asked for clothes and food. I still said "no." And yesterday there was a man outside on the street who was wailing loudly as a way to show he was in need. I didn't go out.

I posted a comment on Facebook about the guy outside crying and wasn't surprised to get a response about how I should go out and help him. I ask myself that. I play the scenarios through in my head. Whatever I give isn't enough. He will still continue to beg and have barely enough to live on. Beggars and the poor are all around me. Whenever we drive the streets of Delhi we see them on the street or side of the road. Skinny women and children holding small babies with an empty bottle, asking for money for milk. But they aren't buying milk. It is just a tactic to get money. Or a father holding a small, sickly child with a prescription from a doctor. He is asking for money to buy medicine for the child, so he says.

God hasn't given me the power to heal anyone yet. I would love it if he would. I give clothes to people, sometimes food and money too. But it is never enough. There are always more people and more needs. It is overwhelming. Sometimes I have to turn the other way. Sometimes I have a smile to give and nothing else. But what does that do?

I know I have a lot of material possessions and money. I have never gone hungry more than one meal. But am I blessed more than them?

Bathroom cleaning

Bathrooms are cleaned differently here than I cleaned them in the US. I just used our bathroom after our house help lady cleaned it. The toilet seat was splashed with water. That reminded me how things are done here. Or at least how she does it.

To clean the bathroom, first she splashed the blue cleaner all around the walls and in the toilet. I don't think any scrubbing is done on the shower, but the toilet bowl will be brushed. I know she doesn't take any rags or brushes besides the toilet brush in with her. Hmmmm, so what is she washing the sink with? Anyway, then the hose on the wall is used to spray it all down. Ta da! All done.

When I was into cleaning my own home, I would bring a rag or scrub brush into the bathroom with me. I would wipe the cleaner around and use the brush to wash the tub and sink. I would use a rag to wash the toilet seat and around the edges.

Now that I think about it all, I sure don't want to drop my toothbrush in the sink.

Matron

I had the honor of being the matron of honor in a wedding this weekend. Jessica and Cyril got married on Saturday. I spent the day with Jessica and her mom. We had our nails and hair done. I also had my eyebrows threaded, which today a lady told me that they were done wrong. We then went flower shopping and found some beautiful pink flowers.

On the way to the wedding we had extra time, so Jessica wanted to stop at India Gate for some pictures. We rushed over to the monument and took some pictures. A crowd quickly gathered and she probably had 20 strangers take her picture. Then we went to the wedding.

The wedding was outside, under a tent. It was perfect weather for a wedding in India. The tent was pink so it went great with the flowers. And the cake was lovely. Jessica and Cyril looked so precious. I got to see Cyril's expression when she walked down the aisle. I heard him say, "Wow!"

The only bad part of the wedding was when the matron of honor had to give a speech. It sounded so stupid. But I doubt anyone will remember that when they think of the wedding. Here are some pictures to enjoy.

Rice, Rice, Baby!

I opened the expensive bag of rice that Steve bought and poured it into our rice container. Guess what. Bugs. The expensive rice has lots of little black rice bugs. Worse yet, I know our househelp lady doesn't pick through the rice when she makes lunch, she just adds black seeds so I can't see the bugs. Looking forward to lunch tomorrow. Anyone want to come over?

Ripped Off!

I hate getting ripped off! Today, Steve came home with a 1kg bag of rice. You don't pick your own groceries out at the store, you just ask for something and they get it for you. So you have to check what they are giving you. And naturally, the store owner wants to sell the most expensive brand, and it feels like, especially to the foreigner. So I saw this nice brand of rice and had to look at the price. 142/-!!!!! I can get rice for 20/- that is fine and not full of rocks. So why on earth would I want rice that is 7 times as much? I try not to blame Steve for not looking, or knowing, the price. When I told him how much rice usually costs he was shocked and said he would try to take it back. Sometimes I just feel like screaming!

sadness and disappointment

Yesterday I had a tea party with a discussion on Family Relationships, for the aerobic ladies. The plan was that one of the ladies would share and we would then have a discussion time. But the lady never got around to sharing. It turned into more of a "question from foreigners" time. I had hoped to also add some lessons from the Bible, but that didn't happen.

I was sad when it ended. I felt hopeless. The ladies had shared their stories and they weren't ones I would enjoy living. They said the most Important thing for Indian men is their egos. And they all agreed that men love their mothers more than their wives. The worst, all men are cheaters. Now I know this is not true, not all men need big egos, not all men love their mom's more, and not all men are cheaters. But for the ones who said this, it is their reality. And that is sad.

I asked a friend about the statement that all men are cheaters. Yes, she did indeed mean that they sexually cheat. And their wives are just to accept it. Wow! How sad! Oh, how much they need Jesus. How they must be hurting. But how inadequate I feel. How can I share with them without it seeming as my western point of view? To them it is just the way Indian men are.

So today I am thinking over what to do next. I think I need a Christian Indian woman to come share with them the hope that we have in Christ. I can be thankful for their openness in sharing with me. And I can weep for them.

Micah is 9

Today is Micah's birthday. He is 9 years old!!! Crazy to think that it was 10 years ago that I gave birth to that big baby. I love you Micah! Happy Birthday!

Fame or Fortune

Which would I choose? Fame or Fortune? There is a lot I could do with fortune. I could make my life pretty easy. But I am not a materialistic person. I'm a minimalist. I prefer to get rid of stuff. So I would choose fame.

A friend is writing a book about women in India. Some of the stories will come from her relationship with women she met at the gym. And some will be my stories of relationships I have had with ladies at the gym. I am really excited to read her book. Not just about the gym and to see my name in print, but that will be a big part of it.

"A good name is rather to be chosen than great riches" Proverbs something verse something.

I want people to think of me as a good person who isn't bad to be around. I need people. Sure, people end up ruining everything, but I really need them. Think of church. People are the cause of all the problems at church. Or relationships, people ruin their relationships. But God created us to need each other. It is not good for man to be alone.

Most likely I won't have either fame or fortune. I guess I need to lower my expectations of myself.

New Fish

We got four new fish for our empty fish tank. Two goldfish and two Tiger Sharks. They were in the same tank at the pet store so we figure they get along. We also needed to buy a filter since the last one we had was a joke. But the pet store didn't have the small size. He said he would have it the next day. We are a bit lazy I guess. We didn't want to make another trip to the store, so we went for the medium.

The medium filter is about the same length as our tank. And it is about half as wide. So basically it takes up half of our fish tank. And it looks like a sunken submarine. When Steve put it in the tank, Micah came in to the room and told me, "The filter is so ugly." But the real fun began when we turned it on. It is so powerful that it sucks the fish into the tornado and they go flopping around. It is quite humorous to watch actually. The poor fish try to avoid it, by swimming with all their might. But eventually they get sucked in. Then they get blown into the glass wall. So we only turn it on for a few minutes to give them oxygen and a little exercise, then we turn it off. They look so peaceful when it is off.

The moral of the story is, "If you have a small tank, get a small filter."

Death

I hate to admit it, but I think about death a lot more than I tell my counselors about. When you fill out the form that asks, "Do you think about dying?" I try to give them the answer I think they would like to hear. But the truth is, I think about dying a lot. Go ahead and send the men in white jackets to my house. Even in a padded room, I would think about death.

I read the other day, a recommendation to think about your own death. I think it was to make us realize that our life is a blink and we really don't matter that much in the greater scheme of things. Not a very encouraging thought. But imagine you, lying in the coffin. For one day a handful of people come to visit you there and then they are gone. They go back to their lives without much thought of you not being there. All your things are soon given away (or thrown away), even your money will be spent. Family will remember you but the rest of the world forgets soon.

But death is just a moment. Then there is the afterlife. That is what I want to focus on. Death is dramatic. And when people are all filing by to say good-bye, you will already be on the other side.

I like to think about heaven. I don't like to think about hell. I imagine there will be colors that I have never seen before. I imagine being held in Jesus' arms. I will see my Grandmas there again. And I really want to ask Jesus some questions. Like, "What did you write in the dirt when the men were accusing the woman of adultery?" I wonder if I will be able to fly. Or jump really high. Will I be overcome with emotion when I see Jesus? I am normally not a highly emotional person, so that could be weird for me. But I would love it.

I like to make people laugh. In my death I hope to leave people with a smile on their faces. So that is why, if you come to my funeral, you will have to walk by the open casket. I will have one final joke to share with you (if Steve doesn't stop it from happening that is). I want to be naked in the casket. I hope I am really old, but even if I'm not, that is how I want to go. And I hope they put a big smile on my face, with my teeth showing. I will already have my new body by then, Praise God.

So go ahead and send the men in white to take me away. I already know I'm crazy.

School lunch ideas

Even though I don't have to make brown bag lunches for Micah anymore, I thought I would share some ideas I have. Mostly so my mind will stop thinking about them.

Tired of PB&J? Egg salad, tuna, cheese are good substitutes. But here are some other easy substitutes. Get out a tortilla wrap and put some goodies in it for a change. Meat, cheese and lettuce make a quick wrap. How about a fried egg and cheese. My son likes ketchup with his egg and cheese wrap. Or just a nice veggie wrap with their favorite dressing. Even spaghetti can turn into a wrap.

Kids will eat a lot of things cold. So what about some meatloaf? I've never made meatloaf myself, but I hear you can make a good sandwich out of it. Left over pizza from the night before when you didn't feel like cooking is good. Boiled eggs. Left over spaghetti.

Make a quick snack-pack. Cheese and crackers, crackers with peanut butter, pepperoni slices, beef jerky, granola or garlic bread.

Use the thermos that never gets used. Send some cereal to school and put some milk in the thermos. Soup and crackers. Spaghetti. Top Raman. Chili. Any good, thick soup.

And if you still can't come up with some ideas, my favorite lunch as a kid was when I brought a bag of chocolate covered oreos for lunch and a diet coke. I hope these ideas give you a new round of lunches.

Visitor

This past week we have had our cousin Brian visiting us. He was on a trip is Asia, sailing between different beautiful destinations, and decided to pop over to see us. Obviously you can't sail to Delhi, so he flew. We had a wonderful time with him.

I went with him to Humayan's Tomb, which is just a walk away. We took a cycle rickshaw since it was hot and a fun experience. Humayan's Tomb is a beautiful structure, like the Taj Mahal. It is made out of red sandstone. We first climbed around some of the ruins and then went to the tomb.

The next day we did some shopping. We went to Dilli Haat, a handicraft market. I found the perfect wall hanging. It was another hot day so we sweated and drank lots of water. Brian found some nice gifts for people. Then it was off to Sarojini Nagar, a very crowded market. That is a good India experience. Shoving, yelling, street venders, smells, beggars, and piles of clothes to buy.

On Monday Steve took Brian to the Taj Mahal. They went by train which is only 3 hours. Another fun experience. It rained all day on them. But still the Taj is beautiful.

The best part of the visit was being able to get to know Brian better. It doesn't really matter what we do together, it is just being together that is good.

Rabies and God

I started thinking about rabies today. My parents are thinking of making a trip out to visit us and are starting to get their shots. They wonder if they should get the rabies shots.

A few years ago, Luke, who was 10, died of rabies. I had never met him but his story touched my heart. He and some other kids were friends with some of the homeless dogs around his house. One of the dogs was acting a bit weird. It didn't bite Luke, but possibly licked or scratched him. No one knows for sure. A few days later Luke got sick. He had a bad headache and fever. He started shaking and his throat hurt. His mom got a nurse friend to come check on him. She noticed several symptoms of rabies right away.

Luke's family lived close to a hospital. In fact, his dad worked at the hospital. But this was a small town and the hospital didn't have anything to help him. They suggested he make the 6 hour drive to Delhi. All the way to Delhi his parents were sitting with him as he got worse. He was acting violent at times and his dad had to hold him still. They knew there wasn't much that could be done for him anymore, so they talked to him about heaven. They told him that soon he would get to be with Jesus. In Delhi, the hospital said that the only thing they could do is lock him in a room and his parents could watch him through a window. They gave him some sedatives. His parents chose to go back to their small hospital where the staff loved Luke and they would have him die there. So they drove another 6 hours. Luke was given more sedatives to calm him down. He had a lot of anxiety, a lot of pain. Soon Luke died.

As a parent, thinking of going through this with my son, I know I would do anything to take his pain on myself. I would take the rabies, I would die. It would be so heart wrenching to watch my son die with so much pain. This thought made me think about mankind and what God must feel. He watches us, his children, with so much pain because of sin. He would do anything to take it on himself. And that is why he came to earth as a man, to take all our sickness upon himself and be the one to die in our place. A painful death. But he loves us so much that it was an easy decision.

I'm sure Luke's parents wish he wouldn't have played with the dogs that day. And I'm sure God wishes we had never chosen to sin.

TV comedy writer

I just read some instructions on how to become a TV Comedy Writer and I think I should make my blog my practice place. I want to get a job writing for "The Office" or better yet, acting in it. They look like normal people. And I wouldn't even need to get paid a lot. It just looks like so much fun. I looked at some bloopers on Youtube and people are always laughing. Wouldn't that be great to have a job that makes you laugh all day long?

I think there needs to be an episode focused on Oscar that isn't all about him being gay. Or maybe one on Kevin that isn't all about him being slow. I will write one.

Frustrated

Nothing for dinner. Again. What to make? I have spaghetti noodles. So I could go to the store and buy sauce. Oh, and a can of corn and bread. There ya go. Instead Steve offers to go to the store. I told him the list (3 things) and said either the imported sauce or the yellow box of tomato paste. Off he went. Well I guess we are still not communicating too well even after counseling. He came back with cereal, spicy indian spaghetti sauce, peanut butter, juice with a free glass, no bread and no corn.

So I made the spaghetti. While I was boiling the water for the noodles I looked through the cupboards to see what else there was. There were two jars of oatmeal. So I decided I could make granola. I found a recipe that only called for 4 things; peanut butter, oats, brown sugar and oil. I didn't have oil, but I did have ghee, so I went for it.

By the time I mixed the granola all together, the spaghetti was done. I toasted some bread to go with it and called it a meal. Our mouths burned with the spice of the sauce. Then I started cooking the granola. My stupid oven doesn't work right so soon smoke was coming from the oven. My granola was burnt. The parts that weren't burnt didn't taste good either, because with only four ingredients it isn't anything special. So that was a bust.

The straw that broke this camels back was not having my camera. I wanted to take a picture of my granola. But yesterday I loaned the camera to a friend "for a day" and it was the second day and still no camera. And the friend said he couldn't bring it back yet. So I was kicking myself for loaning something to someone. I get burned. Like my granola.

Bully Fish, Good Fish, Gold Fish, Black Fish

Our fish, Sucky, died a few days ago. He was a sucker fish. The kind that are suppose to clean the tank. I think our tank was too clean. So he just died. Then there is the Angel fish who was picking on the goldfish. We would take him out of the tank everyday and put him in time-out. Then Goldy would be able to swim around freely. And he/she sure knew when it was safe. The second Michael (Angel) was out of the tank, Goldy would come out from hiding and swim.

Well yesterday was odd. Goldy was actually chasing Michael. Michael was running away from Goldy. What changed? Today they are swimming next to each other as friends. I guess they worked it out.

More back problems

My househelp lady called this morning to let me know she isn't coming today. So all those dishes that have been piling up, waiting for her, will have to be done by someone.

From what I understood from Bimla (househelp), she got electrocuted from the cooler somehow. The shock knocked her backwards and she hurt her back. Sounds bad. I think she also said she is burned on one side of her body. Talking Hindi on the phone is hard for me. I think I need hand motions to understand more.

I really can relate to the back pain now and understand she needs rest. I can't imagine doing all the work she does, with a hurt back. I don't even think I could squat to use the toilet like she has to. I hope she gets the rest she needs.

Achy, Breaky Back

I am feeling older than my age. Like maybe 58 years old. I am walking around all bent over and slow. You see, on Saturday morning I threw my back out. I don't even know what that really means, but I think what I did is what people mean when they say it.

I was the only one awake and so I made my chai so I could sit and spend some quiet time with God. But then I saw all the laundry hanging on the rack and that would disturb me, so as my chai was cooling in the kitchen, I started folding the laundry. As I reached down to grab Steve's boxers off the bottom rack, a sharp pain crippled me. I couldn't move because of the pain. So I was left squatting. That hurt my legs after a while so I made it to the ground and just laid there.

As I was on the ground (and remember, these are hard, marble floors, not carpet), I kept thinking of my chai which was getting cold. Should I yell for Steve to come help me? No, I didn't want to scare him. So I just stayed where I was. Finally, about 20 minutes later, Steve came out. I said, "Hey there". He was shocked to see me on the floor. I told him I hurt my back and couldn't move, "could you bring me my chai?" It was cold by then. I got myself into a sitting position so I could drink it.

Eventually I got up. We had a baseball game to go to and I really wanted to go. So I slowly got dressed and got ready for the game. I was able to walk slowly and hunched over, looking quite old.

The cool thing is that I got to watch Micah play baseball. He even caught a fly ball. He slid into third and was safe. He hit the ball into outfield. It was all worth it. So even with an achy back, I loved watching him play baseball.

Fish

I wish the pet store owner would have told us that Angel fish and goldfish don't get along. Our Angel fish is torturing our goldfish now. We had to separate him into a bowl for a time-out.

Rats!

I went to visit my friend Kusum the other day. She lives in the neighborhood next to us. I met my coworker and we walked together. Kusum lives in a one room (I guess you could call it studio) apartment. There is room for a double bet and a cot. We entered in the groundfloor apartment and asked if Kusum was home. That lady walked us up to the second floor and yelled to Kusum that she had company. Kusum was sleeping on the cot with her daughter, but she got up quickly to greet us. We sat on the bed. So Kusum went outside the room to the little kitchen area and started making chai for us. She had to send someone to the market to buy some snacks to give us too. So as Rhonda and I sat on the bed, we discussed what we wanted to talk about with Kusum. Rhonda was memorizing a story in Hindi and I suggested she try and share it with Kusum. It was the story of Jesus calming the storm.

While Rhonda was practicing I noticed a movement on the floor out of the corner of my eye. I'm use to seeing mice so I thought that was what it was. Sure enough, I saw the little guy. It was white, which is unusual. Then Rhonda saw what she thought was another one, but was actually the same one that moves fast from one place to another. I started thinking that maybe this was a pet since it was white. So I yelled to Kusum to ask her. She came in and called for "Kichi" to come. She grabbed the little creature and put him on the bed next to me. Normally I would freak out, but I kept my cool. On closer look I decided that this wasn't a mouse, but a rat. And I remember that rats are actually quite clean creatures and don't bite. I learned that from a pet store. So I picked up the rat.

I thought about all the diseases we could be getting. Why am I holding a rat? I put Kichi back on the ground for him to run around. He went in some bowls and cups, looking for food. He climbed on some clothes on the floor. I wonder if those bowls get washed well and disinfected? I wonder about our chai cups and if Kichi had had chai out of them before? Kusum put him back on the bed and he smelled our snacks. Rhonda was quick to pull him away and tell him "no Kichi!" Then we ate and drank our chai.

Rhonda got to share two stories with Kusum. She first shared Jesus calming the storm and then the woman at the well. I asked Kusum to tell us the story back and she did great.

Why do we do the things we do? Why do we drink water that could make us wake up with the runs? Why do we eat on plates that a rat ate on? Why on earth did I hold a rat? Just so we can share these stories with Kusum. When we were preparing to leave, Kusum told us her husband was sick and I told her we would pray for him. And as we walked away we rejoiced that God's word was shared and that He will use it in Kusum.

BCAS

Breast Cancer Awareness Seminar! We had one back in April I think it was. Three weeks of training on how to do a self exam and what to look for. One of the ladies that came to seminar found a lump when she did a self exam a couple of months ago. So she made an appointment to see her doctor. The doctor was surprised that she found it herself. She was able to tell the doctor about the BCAS and all that she learned. The doctor was very impressed. It turned out that the lump was a cyst and she is fine. I am so proud of Samina for doing the self exam and for going to the doctor. I am so happy that it wasn't anything too serious. And I am hopeful that other ladies will learn from her experience and do the self exam. Early detection is the best defense for breast cancer.

Construction Hell

There are three houses near us that are being constructed. One has been going on for three years probably. It is five stories high (American counting)or four stories for Indian standard. For around a year and a half it was not being worked on because the law didn't allow basements. So they had to seal the basement. Then there must have been other issues for why it wasn't being built. There was at least one man who lived in the partially built house all that time. He was probably the guard. Well now it is having marble laid. That may be the worst step in home construction for the neighbors. It is SO LOUD. The sound of marble being cut is like fingernails on a chalkboard.

That house is behind us a stones throw away. Across the street is another house that is being built. Around two months ago we noticed the people move out. Then the construction crew (4-5 men with sledge-hammers) showed up. They started hammering away, tearing it down one brick at a time. I was surprised at how quickly they brought the whole house down. I think it took 5 weeks for them to tear the three stories down. The bricks were then hauled away and a tractor showed up to dig the hole. Then a truck full of bricks came back and the laying of the walls began. The tearing down was loud. Imagine every four seconds a hammer hitting bricks. I think it will be a good 8 months of building for this house, if we are lucky.

Well then a couple weeks ago I started hearing banging again. This was coming from our next door neighbor. I thought they were hanging a picture or maybe fixing a wall. It is a new house that we went through two years of banging noise with. Well actually it is now the house two doors down. All the houses are connected, like row houses. So now that house is being torn down. Brick by brick. Bang, bang, bang.

Noise pollution is the worst pollution here. Especially when you live in an older neighborhood. All the old houses are being rebuilt. In our neighborhood of maybe 400 houses, I know of about 10 that are being built. The piles of dirt and sand in the streets is a nuisance. But the banging is enough to drive me crazy. And I really don't need any help there.

little cuties

Broken

Steve took the kids (slum kids) skate boarding today. One of the boys broke his arm. So now Steve is at the hospital with him and it looks like he will have to have surgery. Poor kid. And poor Steve.

Over looked again!

The same old feelings are gnawing at my heart again. The lump in my throat that I try to push down. Not knowing how to express my hurt. Not even knowing if it is selfish of me to feel the way I do. But here I am again, feeling over looked.

I found out today that there is a conference that is being planned and I wasn't invited to it. I think I should have been invited. But this happens about every year or so and I am never initially invited. Usually I am an after thought and someone will forward me the invitation. I am thankful for those who do think of me, but then it just reinforces the fact that I wasn't thought of before.

Why does it hurt? You would think I would get used to not being invited to these things since I never have been. But each time it happens it stabs me in the heart again. I feel like throwing in the towel and quitting my job. Who wants to work at a place where they aren't noticed. But then I remind myself that I do this for God, not for others to notice. Or at least that is what I know I am suppose to be doing. But the truth is, I want to be noticed. I want to count. I want to be valued.

I don't think they make pain medicine for this kind of hurt. Or at least it isn't legal. Someone get me a Dr. Pepper on the rocks!

Dreams and nightmares

Way back in my early 20's, one of the things I dreaded most was becoming a stay at home mother. What could be worse? Some ladies just loved the thought of being a mom, wife, cook, teacher, all wrapped up in one. I thought I would die if I had to home school my kid. I thought I would die just becoming a mom. I wanted to work outside the home. I wanted to save the world.

Now here I am, a stay at home mother who home schools her son. How did that happen? I have cooked more meals in the last month than in the last year combined. Which means I have to do more dishes too. I still am working, but that also is out of our home.

I'm not hating it. I know this will be just for a season of my life. Micah will most likely go back to school someday, I will be busy outside of the home, I will stop cooking, and I will save the world. But until that day, may God give me the grace that I need each day. I would also hope to find joy in the midst of the daily grind. I get to spend time with Micah and see him learn things (which other people tell me is great). We get to sit around the table each night and eat food that I lovingly have created. And I get to sit and drink chai with ladies after aerobics. The nightmare isn't that bad.

FRIDAY!

Friday has come again. This week seemed to go fast. We did home schooling, which went well for not having materials yet. We aren't planners so we haven't gotten around to planning which curriculum to use with Micah. Slowly we are piecing things together.

Today I had lunch with a friend. The place we met at is only a couple of miles from our home. It is always an adventure to drive here though. First of all, our car is falling apart. The power steering went out. It makes a horrible sound and takes more muscle to control. Then there is a major intersection that the traffic signals are being replaced at. So for the past week or two there have not been any signals. We Indians don't do four way stops. When the signal is out we just all go. So you have to weave your way through the intersection. It actually works smoother than a signal.

So I went to the normal restaurant that we meet at. I walked in and it looked different, so I thought I was at the wrong place. So I left. Then I stood outside and thought about it and convinced myself that it was in fact the right place. But I didn't want to turn around again right away so I went shopping. I bought a bag of Dorritos for a present for a party Micah is going to today and walked around the market. Then I went back.

We had a very encouraging time together over lunch. My friend is always enjoyable to be with. She encouraged me with scripture Ps. 25, Jer. 17., and we had laughing time. I picked out the meal, which was Chicken Gassi. I just liked the name.

Now I am going to go make myself some Thai Iced Tea and spend a little bit of time focusing on the two scripture passages.

Happy Friday to all!

Thai Iced Tea

A friend was kind enough to bring me a pack of Thai Iced Tea mix from their recent trip to Thailand. Now I am loving my break time again. Actually, I was even more thrilled to hear that they had two packs. So now I am set for 20 days of Thai Iced Tea.

Thanks Laura!

Khan Market

One of the things that Steve and I are suppose to do to help us learn to communicate better is to plan meals. So today we sat down and planned the next week of meals. Then we made of shopping list. And off we went to Khan Market, the upscale shopping area close to our home.

It has been several weeks since I have been out in Delhi, before our Thailand trip, so I guess I had forgotten about the pollution. Not the air pollution but the noise pollution. We sat down in a restaurant and I was immediately bombarded with noise. Steve said, "I like this song." But I couldn't hear it over all the noise. People talking, kids whining, dishes clinking. The whole meal was like that. The little kid at the table next to me was so loud and whiny that I could hardly take it anymore. I was glad to leave.

But outside was worse. As we walked to the other side of the market to do our shopping we had to go on the road and in the parking area. "HONK! HONK! HONK!" Argh! It was so loud. We pushed our way in to the stores and bought what we needed then headed to the car. More honking. More heat. More temperatures rising. I was glad to finally get to the car and turn the a/c on and drive home.

The best part about the shopping trip was that I found some Dr. Pepper. So I have a can waiting for me to enjoy as I unwind from the trip.

Mud

It has been raining lately. Not a lot, but just a bit each day. I think it rains at night when we are sleeping. But a couple of days ago we had a big rain storm. It rained for maybe an hour. So that caused flooding in the city. All the drains are flooded and the sewers back up. Streets are full of water for a day. And now they are full of dirt. It was mud, but it dried to dirt. Our street seems especially dirty.

The other bad thing about rain is the sewers. Like I said, they get blocked or flooded. So you will see piles of sewer mud all over the city. Someone has to come along and dig into the sewer, but they just leave the piles. So it gets stinky. We have a few piles on our street. Spot is attracted to those piles.

And the other nasty part of the rainy season is that when the sewer is being unplugged, they often times leave the manhole cover off. Especially if it is flooded. So you could step into what you think is ankle deep water and end up in chest deep sewer scum. That happened to a friend a couple years ago. Ever since then I have been extra careful in the water.

Black Magic

Yesterday, after aerobics, I was sitting around with the ladies drinking chai. Usha's husband has been sick for about a month now. She described him as being anxious and nervous all the time. So he just lays in bed when he is at home. So the ladies were discussing what was wrong with him. It was all in Hindi so I wasn't following completely. Then there was a word I didn't understand so I asked Hena what it meant. She told me, "Black Magic".

Usha is a Hindu. She has offered sacrifices for her husband's illness. She has asked me to pray for him. She has asked others too. So I asked Usha if she would like a man to come pray for her husband. She told me that she had already prayed for him. I said, "In Jesus' name though." And she told me that she had prayed in all names. So I left it at that.

Today I am thinking about it all again. So this morning, after aerobics again, I asked an English speaker to explain Black Magic more to me. She said that there are lots of types, curses that people put on others. She said that when she got married her in-laws took one of her outfits and did some sort of ritual to put a curse on her marriage. And ever since then she has had a bad marriage. She said that Usha thinks her husband is possessed with evil spirits. Either someone cursed him or it just happened. So now I wonder if it would be good to pray over him or not. I mean, if he isn't a believer in Jesus, what good would it do to cast out demons? More could come and harm him even further. So what should I do? Give me your thoughts.

not good looking, rats!

Steve will be going to a friends' house to see if he can help solve their rat problem. It seems they have a rat the size of a hamster in one of the cupboards. I personally think they would know more about what to do since they use to live in a house with a rat problem. Once they came home from a weekend away and found rat droppings under their pillows.

The other day one of the ladies who comes for aerobics was talking with me over chai. Her four daughters were with her. And we had a friend of ours and her three daughters also. Our friend has some physical problems that have caused her hands and feet to be deformed. So we were talking about how in India it would be really difficult for a lady with any kind of "defect" to find a husband. Any little scar could mean singlehood or becoming a second wife. Our muslim friend commented, "My in-laws are not very attractive people and unfortunately my daughters have taken after them. But I only look on the inside." Can you believe it??!!! Right in front of her daughters too. My American friend said to the girls that they are very beautiful. I just gasped. Probably not the best reaction. Anyway, I wonder how hurtful her comments are to her girls. And I wonder how much she must be hurt herself.

picture above

I love the picture above. It was taken several years ago while Steve was out skateboarding. He and two other guys were skating on the side of a busy street. There is a underground walkway to cross the street. Above the walkway there is a great structure for skating. So Steve and the others were were skating there. Traffic started slowing so that people could watch. First rickshaws were stopping, then cars, and finally buses. As you see, people were enjoying the skateboarding. I just love the expressions on their faces.

Fat

I think mannequins should be made fatter. That would let me know what an outfit would look like on me. Most of the clothes look great on a size 0 dummy, but when I put them on they just don't seem to be as cute.

Yes, I am one of many women who have a weight problem. Not that I am fat, I just think about my weight too much. Pretty much every day at some point I will think about my weight and if I am happy with my size or not. That can't be healthy. And it is especially difficult when we are on vacation. We haven't been eating horribly, but it is more than we do at home. And I'm not exercising at all except for the pool.

So enough of my weight.....

We had to buy Micah a new stuffed animal on this trip. He needed something to snuggle with. Brownie doesn't get to go on vacations with us. He is mine and Micah's teddy bear. One time, many years ago, Brownie got left in a Paris hotel. Luckily, Micah asked “Where's Brownie?” before we got on the shuttle to the airport. Steve went back to the hotel room and found Brownie under the bed. So now he has to stay home. I guess I usually pack another friend for Micah, but forgot this time. So now we have George, a cute monkey.

When we went to the zoo the other day we stopped at the pet store (or toy store/gift shop) and saw a cute guy that Micah called George. I said it was too expensive and that we would surely find one at the mall for much cheaper. So right after the zoo we had to walk through the mall. We finally found this George. He was a bit more than the zoo one, but he would have to do. I felt bad for being so cheap at the zoo. Now Micah covers George's ears to tell me, “The other George was cuter.”

We leave tomorrow to go to Bangkok on the night train, and then to Delhi. I don't feel ready to go back. Not sure what will help. Not more food. There is one final store I want to go to. I need to buy some tuna fish and some pants. Shopping is so much easier here. I'm glad it is raining in Delhi now so the temperatures should be much better. And I will be glad to get back into my aerobic routine and hopefully find my groove.

another great day

We are really enjoying our vacation. We went go-carting yesterday and it was such a joy to see Micah's face as he drove around the track. Of course we are eating great food. I wonder why it is so easy to gain weight in two weeks and why it takes so long to lose it. But I keep telling (lying to myself) that I will lose it when I get back to doing aerobics again. Mango with sticky rice is the best! Is it a dessert? Or is it a healthy meal?

Enjoying Thailand

Today is our fifth day in Thailand. Our first day we were pretty tired from the all night flight here. We just stayed at the hotel, which was a very nice hotel. The next day we went to the mall and watched a movie, Ice Age 3-D. Great sweet popcorn. We also went bowling. When we got back to the hotel our friend was waiting outside, just leaving. He had come to the hotel to look for us and was just giving up when we came. So that was a fun coincidence. The next day we spent at the hotel swimming pool and ate food from 7-11. You can get cheap, good food there. And yesterday we went to another mall to spend the day. Steve got a foot massage and I had a full body massage. A guy did my massage. He even massaged my butt, which is a bit odd. But the massage sure felt good. And finally to the train station for our night train to Chiang Mai. And here we are. Very nice hotel. And it happens to be connected to a mall.

We found a Toy's R Us in the mall and Micah found a fun airplane which we couldn't say “no” to. We had our hamburgers today at Mike's. Great burgers.

Counting the days!

We are counting the days until our trip to Thailand. So excited. And so needing a rest. This has been the hottest summer in ten years, so the newspaper says. Thankfully we have had good electricity with very few power cuts. There was a week of no water, but our tank was full, so we didn't even realize it. Now the monsoon has started. It is a bit weak, but cooler none the less.

The month of June was busy for our house. We had visitors almost constantly. By the end of the month I was almost out of my hospitality desire. I just needed a day of no one but the three of us in our house.

We have also been working with friends to try to get a young girl moved into a hostel. She is the 11 year old daughter of a prostitute and the mother would like her to be in a better place. The problem was that the "father" was not in town or for some reason wasn't signing the paper that needed signing. Today it all worked out. I really didn't have anything to do with it, but prayer. I saw the mother and daughter today on their way to the hostel, where the girl will live with eleven other girls and some wonderful Christian ladies taking care of them. They will all go to school and get tutoring. They will be well fed and cared for. As I met the mother today she told me she wants me to come visit her more. This excites me. I really enjoyed spending time with her in the brothel and I desire to show the ladies love.

A couple days ago I was talking with some young ladies who were staying with us. We were sitting at the kitchen table and I noticed someone had written on the table. It said, "No Fat". I asked Steve about it and he said that our friend who was over for an English lesson had done it. I had guessed that it was him since it isn't the first item of furniture to be written on. I was mad. It was not just written on the table, but permanently marked in the wood. Once he had written on Micah's bedroom wall "Micah room". I still don't understand the writting on walls in this culture, but you see it in many houses.

Yesterday after aerobics several of the ladies and I went to one lady's house for chai. It was a wonderful visit with lots of food. We had freshly made pizza, pastry puffs, cheese cake, chai and cookies. A nice after workout snack.

Thailand baby!

We get to go to Thailand next month for two weeks. We are really looking forward to this trip. Kind of a reward after going through the hottest months. Next summer I hope we remember to make plans to be gone in June.

We have to leave the country every six months because of our visa. Kind of a forced vacation.

Micah made a list of what he hopes to do in Thailand. Here it is.

donut shop
aquarium
mall
eat hamburgers
snake farm
zoo
waterfall

I think we can manage those things. I also hope there is a good kid movie out that we can go see. The movie theaters are so nice there and the sweet popcorn is the best.

Depression quiz

I decided to take a depression quiz since I had nothing better to do. I scored "clinically depressed". Now I really feel depressed. Lack of interest in things, lack of energy, thoughts of death (don't worry, I always think about death and life after death), sleeping more or less, loss of appetite. But I wonder if these things are because of the heat. I have no desire to leave my house because I know it is too hot for any Oregonian to handle.

Maybe I should take another test. Or just go eat more cookies.

Alone with cookies

I am making chocolate chip cookies right now. Each batch takes ten minutes to cook. So I am using my 10 minutes wisely by playing on the computer, listening to a sermon, reading a blog, and now writing on my blog. A lot can happen over ten minutes.

Two days ago one of my trainers asked me to make her kids some cookies. She doesn't have an oven. So I said I would. She will be here tomorrow so I have to get them ready. Some of the problems with making cookies in 110 degree weather is that the chocolate chips melt before they get baked, I sweat and the oven heats up the house. But I made a promise.

I have a very small oven also. I can make 9 mini cookies at a time. And after each batch is done I have to make sure they taste okay, so I eat one. That means 8 cookies are ready every ten minutes. This could take a long time.

No one else is home right now. They are all at a friends house for dinner. Steve went to pick up Micah from a friend's house and they invited him to stay. I could have taken a auto rickshaw to their house to join them but I had just started the cookies, so I stayed home. Dangerous situation. Alone with the cookies. And it is dinner time and I have nothing else to eat (that is as good). So I eat the cookies.

a week of good byes

I have had my husband gone for a week now. And my little boy (who isn't so little). They are at kids camp and having a great time. It is cooler there and they can play outside with other kids. Micah has really enjoyed the craft time. He even made a bird/bat house. He said we can close it up at night so no bats make it their home.

I have not been alone at home. First I had a friend stay who was leaving for America. The day after she left I had another friend come for the day who was heading to Canada. The same night that she left, a couple arrived who will stay a few days and then go to America. All the arrivals and departures are around 10:30 at night. So there has been a lot of activity at our house lately.

One nice thing about having people stay with us before they leave is that they usually leave things with us that won't fit in their luggage. Or things like shampoo that they can replace easily. So I am well stocked in that area.

One not so nice thing is that I have to be the farewell committee and I am just not good at saying good-bye. I am not emotional about the fact that I won't see that person again. I'm not hard hearted, but I am a realist. We have a lot of people who come and go. We know them for a short time and enjoy them, but then they go back to their home. We will always have them in our hearts and can stay in touch through email, but there won't be the closeness anymore.

So this time of the year there is a lot of transitions. Every week at church the pastor asks who is leaving and we say good-bye to them. In a few months it will be the time when new people arrive. That is a much more exciting time. We have also learned how to quickly get to know people. This is also a gift. Our life in America was much different. You just don't get to know people as easily. So here you meet someone once or twice and you have become friends. I really like that.

Steve and Micah return today. I had hoped for more alone time, but it just didn't happen. I am glad to have them back. I missed them. And I am glad they had such a great time at camp.

Anxiety and fears

The other day while we were having an aerobics class at my house, a car drove down our street with their stereo so loud that it shook our walls. I froze for a second and immediately my mind went to "Earthquake!" I didn't yell it (thankfully)and realized it was just a stereo. But I realized I have a fear of earthquakes. Whenever there is a loud rumble or something shakes, I shift to disaster mode. I start thinking of how to best escape the house or protect those around me from the walls crumbling down. Why is that? I have gone through a few earthquakes. They usually aren't that big, but one was the big one in Pakistan and we felt it a bit here. So now when there is a small earthquake that I feel, I think, "Boy, somewhere that must have been big."

My other fear is tsunamis. I guess it goes along with earthquakes since it is an earthquake at sea that causes a tsunami. So now whenever I go to the coast (which isn't much) I fear a tsunami. I watch the ocean and if there seems to be any receding of the water I am ready to grab my son and run away. I watch the birds to see if they are acting strange. I figure the animals will be my first signal of the doom coming my way.

God is our refuge and strength,

A very present help in trouble.

Therefore will we not fear, though the earth do change,

And though the mountains be shaken into the heart of the seas;

Though the waters thereof roar and be troubled,

Though the mountains tremble with the swelling thereof.

Selah

Psalms 46

sick

I am sick. I have a bad cold. The kind that if you lean over, your nose drips on the ground. The bummer is that Steve is gone for a week. So I can't lay around all day like I would like to. I have Micah to take care of and entertain.

We also passed our sickness on to some friends who were leaving to return to Guatamala. Unfortunately, their trip took them through Mexico. In Mexico they have a fever detector and it got them. So now they are in a hotel in Mexico waiting to make sure they don't have Swine Flu. And if they have it, then I guess I have it too.

I heard Kermit the Frog died from Swine Flu. That is so sad. I always liked him. But he must have been getting old anyway.

Just some ramblings

Yesterday we took Micah to the doctor. He has been sick with a fever and coughing for several days. The hospital we went to is a local one that is not very big or very busy. It was 11:15 a.m. and we were told the doctor would be in, in 15 minutes. So we waited. I noticed in the sky light that there was a huge spider web. I thought how funny it would be if the web fell down on someone. They would totally freak out. Micah said it would also be funny if the security guard then thought that the person was an enemy of Spiderman and attacked him.

We saw the doctor walk in and get herself situated. Then she walked past us and downstairs. So Steve asked the reception guy if we should also go downstairs. He said yes. Downstairs there were two people waiting, but Steve walked up to the office door and knocked and the doctor was ready for us. So she asked me what his temperature was. I didn't know. So she felt his head and said he was hot. She looked in his throat and said that he had a bad throat. And that is why he has a fever. She wrote up a prescription for 4 medicines and that was that.

I always look up the medicines online before I give them to Micah. Once I was given some cough syrup that online was listed as dangerous for white people. Odd. Anyway, one of the medicines was for diarreah so I am not giving him that unless the other stuff makes him sick.

As we checked out at the reception area the guy said to me, "You are doing an injustice to men by not opening a gym for men." I laughed and told him, "I only like women." I find it comical that he knew who I was without me saying anything. One of the doctors use to come to the gym, but that was years ago. Maybe he says that to all white women.

Speaking of white women.... One of the white women was working at a VBS last week. She was one of two whities. As she was saying good-bye to her student she said, "I will see you in the assembly." But the little boy responded, "But there are two of you. I won't know which one you are."

Kids are funny. This morning Micah was watching through the key hole of our bedroom, out to the front room where we do aerobics. I guess we were laughing and he wanted to see what was going on. He told Steve, "They are giving massages. Sounds like pub."

This week my house help lady is gone. She has a brother who has had four accidents lately. So her family is fasting and praying (hindu) for him this week. Then they will have to feed the village on the last day. Hopefully that will get rid of any evil spirits.

With my house help gone it means I have to do all the dishes and the floors and cook. It is a lot of work. I sweep and mop each day the whole house. I cook food and do dishes at the same time, only to end up with more dishes after we eat. It never ends. And that is why I like to order out.

Why do I feel guilty?

I have a book that is titled, "Why Do I Feel Guilty Saying No?" But I need one that says, "Why Do I Feel Guilty Using the A/C?" Yesterday we had the a/c on almost all day. Usually we just try to use it at night to sleep with. But you don't get to enjoy it when you are sleeping. Steve doesn't have a problem with using it all day, but I do. I want to save money or electricity or something. But I am dying of the heat.

One of my new excuses to help me not feel bad about not doing a lot these days is to sit in my room and memorize scripture in Hindi. I am trying to learn the wise man who built his house on the rock. So far I have one verse memorized.

Two days ago I went to a brothel for the first time. I went with a friend to pick up a prostitute to take her to a home for girls. She has a daughter who she would like to send away for school for protection. Growing up in a brothel is not ideal for any kid, but for a daughter it is even more dangerous. So I drove around for about three hours, to the brothel, to the school, back to the brothel area and home.

I learned something while I was in the brothel. When one of the prostitute ladies was on the balcony and I decided to go be friendly and talk to her, I learned that being on the balcony is how she calls customers. I went out and asked her what she was doing. I said, "Are you just out watching people?" Stupid me. She finally had to tell me that she was calling for men to make them look up. I said something like, "Oh, so maybe I should go back inside." Duh!

I don't know how any guy would want to be with these ladies. They are not attractive and the room they are in is dingy. The one we took to the school is six months pregnant. She was complaining that her lower stomach is sore from the men being heavy. These ladies are probably 35 years old, but seem much older to me. What a sad life they have had. One was telling us that two prostitutes were killed the other night. Gas was poured on them and then they were burned. I'm sure they are all nervous that something like that could happen to them too. And they don't make much money at all. The house they live in (the brothel) is very simple and has paint chipping off the walls. No mattresses on the beds, just wood. They cook on a small burner in the room. I just don't understand their lives. And how do we help them to have a better life?

P.S. I left the song "Hot Town" on because I think it is appropriate for this posting too.

Hot town!

Of course you have heard me complain about the heat lately. This will be a regular thing for the next couple of months. I looked on CNN weather page to see just how hot it was and it said at midnight that it was "99 and dreary". So true.

We are thankful for electricity and air conditioners. When I do aerobics I turn the a/c on and it makes it bearable. You would think that the fat would just melt off. The problem is that ice cream is so cold and refreshing. Then there are mango shakes. yum.

I Quit!

My gym job, that is. I quit the job. On Monday I called up the other trainer and told her I wouldn't be coming in and to please tell the ladies that I was sorry to have to leave them. So about 10 minutes later the manager called and I explained that I didn't find it worth my time to not be getting paid. He asked me to finish off the month and then he would pay me. But I held my ground and said no. I of course won't get any money for the six weeks I worked, but at least I don't have to fret about it anymore. It feels good to have told him that it was unfair to expect me to work without pay.

It is finished!

Let's say at the grocery store you shop at they let you have an account and at the end of the month you pay it off. That would be an interesting way to keep track of your food budget. I think on Little House on the Prairie they did that. And when you pay your bill off they mark it "paid in full."

I heard a preacher once who said in the original language the phrase "it is finished" would have been the same as "paid in full". That it would be what they would stamp on your bill after you have paid off your debt. I think that is a beautiful description of what Jesus was saying as he breathed his last breath and said those words. Our debt was paid in full. We owed nothing more. The account was closed. Finished.

My gym job

I have been working at a gym for a month now, teaching aerobics. I go three times a week. This is an upscale gym, for people with lots of money. I think members have to pay 4000/- per month. Plus if they want to do aerobics it is an extra 2000/-. The deal is that I will get half of what they pay for aerobics. So 1000/- per person, per month.

So the month is up so I thought I should get paid. I waited a few days to see if the owner would approach me. Nope. So I called him. I said, "So, when do you want to pay me?" His response, "When the month is up." Me, "The month is up." So he hemmed and hawed and said one lady has just paid a couple of days back and another just paid on the 20th. I asked to meet him in person the next day (which was today). He said he would be there at 11:30. Well I was there at 11:30 until 12:15 and he wasn't there. So he just called me. We will meet on Friday.

I really hate getting taken advantage of. I'm sure everyone feels the same way. And I feel this is one of those situations. For my month of work I will be lucky to walk away with 1000/-.

I know I need to work more on my confrontation skills. I can see what I should have done and said in the beginning. But I am just to nice. I hate that. And now I have to wait one more day before I can quit. I was already to quit today but the dude wasn't there. Things like this will keep coming up in my life until I learn how to deal with confrontation head on. Until then I am just frustrated. How long do I have to live in this country before I learn the ways of the Indians?

Breast Model

I have had several modeling jobs over the years. The first was when I was in middle school. I was a finger model for some photo stickers. My fingers were all that was needed for that photo shoot. A few years ago I was a model for some sales company. I was a customer on the phone in the picture. I got to wear lots of make-up for that one. And today I got to be a breast model. Hmmm. Now I can understand the finger model because I have nice fingers, but the breast model was a surprise. And before you think I am completely out of my mind, let me explain.

Today was our second class in a Breast Cancer Awareness Seminar. It was held in our home for the ladies who come for aerobics and their friends. I was asked to demonstrate how the breast exam is done. I didn't have to take off any clothes or anything like that. It was more of the positions that you should take when examining your breasts.

In Delhi, the breast cancer rate is one in nine. And 50% of those ladies will die from breast cancer. With early detection education, we can change that number. So that is what the training is about. We learned how to do a self exam today and then what to do if you find a lump or notice anything strange. Women in America may already know this, but women here are not taught what to do. There is a shame that they feel if they have some sort of defect. And a shame of thinking how much money it could cost their family for treatment. So instead they just try to ignore it. I really believe that this training can help save lives, and that is why I agreed to be the model today.

Bad spelling and warts

So tonight Steve and I went to the market. First was dinner at the Big Chill. Followed by dog food shopping. We also bought a dog tooth brush and toothpaste. I just read the directions and thought the writing was so bad I would share it.
" The Products have the content with bone meal. It's can improve the hygiene in the mouth. Meanwhile can helps to keep his breath smelling fresh. Introduce you dog the taste and sensation by rubbing his teeth gently with small amount of toothpaste. Then to add a small toothpaste on the brush and gently massage his teeth and gums gently. Twice within a week is better."

I also got two warts on my fingers removed. At the consultation they said it would be two thousand ruppees, but when we paid they said, "Now it is three thousand because one was deep." Thanks!

Great Expectations

Sometimes I have a problem with being content. I memorized the scripture that says, "I have learned to be content in any and every circumstance." On good days I can quote it. On those days that I am not doing so good I would be a hypocrite.

Today is 109 degrees. Tomorrow is suppose to be 112. I HATE heat. It zaps all my desires to do anything productive. Like the dishes. Or like a few errands that need to be done. I would rather just lay on my bed under the fan and type on my blog.

The truth is that I don't want to be in India anymore. There, I said it. But for some reason this is exactly where God wants me to be. So I can (sometimes) rest in that assurance and know that I will be fine. He must have a purpose for my life here. So I have great expectations.

"I know how to get along with humble means, and I also know how to live in prosperity; in any and every circumstance I have learned the secret of being filled and going hungry, both of having abundance and suffering need." My contentment doesn't come from things or places or people. I am content because my God will supply all my needs, according to His riches.

So when the electricity goes out and it is 100 degrees inside and I feel like I'm dying, I don't need to throw a hissy-fit, I can rest in the knowledge that God will provide all my needs. And I can have great expectations of how that will be.

My Presswali

A Presswali is a lady who irons clothes for you. We have a lady who comes to our house most days to see if we have clothes to iron. Maybe once a month Steve will have a shirt to be pressed. Usually we have nothing. But she still comes. She comes in and sits on the floor. She looks around and notices all that we have. And since the shoes are nearest the door, she notices them the most. So she asks for shoes. She asks for shoes for her son. She asks for shoes for her granddaughter. And she asks for shoes for herself. I was wearing my new flip flops the other day when she came and she noticed right away. She wanted to know where the old ones were and if I wanted to give them to her. I know I only really need one pair, but I'm not ready to part with my older ones. Sometimes one will get wet and I will wear the others for a while. Or someone else might want to wear some flip flops in our house. So I hold on to them.

Today I had a pair of shoes for the Presswali. They are an old pair of tennis shoes that where left at the gym almost a year ago. They are a little mildewy but besides that they should be great for her son. She was happy to have those. And for my payment for my kindness she gave me an arm massage. She pulled each of my fingers until they popped and then rubbed my arms. It is a bit awkward to be massaged by the presswali, but it is the only way for her to show me her thankfulness I think, so I endure. And as we sat there while she rubbed my arms, she asked if any of my friends had shoes for her granddaughter or if I had gotten shoes for her yet. Oh, and she said her granddaughter really liked the lipstick I had given her several years ago and she wants more.

Flip Flop Frenzy

Well my friend Linda is hosting a Flip Flop Frenzy, which sounds fun. Her bloggy friends were matched up and then sent a new pair of flip flops to each other. I didn't play along since I live in the land of far, far away. But I thought I could at least post a picture of my newest flip flops so I could pretend I was playing along. Mine are the cheapest ones I could find that were still cute, from Thailand.

DARBUNGA!

I like the sound of Darbunga. It reminds me of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.

Darbunga is a city in the state of Bihar, India's poorest and least literate state. My friend and I went there by train to do some training for the first ladies only gym in Darbunga, Fitness Circle. A very exciting trip indeed.

But getting to Darbunga is an experience in itself. It takes 24 hours by train. A lot happens on a train in 24 hours, but not much sleeping. We had a boy next to us who liked to talk at the top of his lungs. And every time the guys came through the car selling something, he wanted it. "Mujhe chai chahiye. Mujhe dudh chahiye." On and on it went. The bathroom on a train is the pits! Literally. It is just a hole in the floor of the bathroom. It will get quite stinky as time passes. It is hard to squat when the train is bouncing down the tracks.

Darbunga was a good experience. Our friends who are opening the gym had it all set up and ready for our training session. There were 6 ladies ready to be trained. It was also good to see my equipment again after two years. So many memories of the first Fitness Circle. And so many hopes for the second Fitness Circle.

One thing we learned on this trip is how easy we have it living in Delhi. Paved roads, electricity most of the time, fast food restaurants, nice homes... It sure makes me appreciate what I have and respect those who live with less.

The train ride back took 23 hours. We had some confusion since our tickets were for the wrong day. But eventually we got seats and played a few games of Scrabble to pass the time. Another night of very little sleep and finally home.

Nuns

I am off to the nunnery today (is that a word?). There is a convent here that you can rent a room in. So I am going for a personal retreat and prayer time. It costs about $7 and you get all three meals and the room for the night. I have been wanting to do this for some time now, but it seems like I never make the time to do it. Well this week is the week. The only bummer is that there is no a/c and it is going to be 107 degrees today. So I am taking my small fan to point straight at my face while I sleep.

He is Risen!

Yesterday my friend and I had an Easter Tea for the ladies that come to aerobics. My friend hid some presents in little containers around the room. She couldn't find any plastic eggs. So then the ladies looked for them. In 12 of the containers were the story of the resurrection. We sat and each one read their verse. After the story we sang a song in Hindi.

A group of us walked home together and I was able to talk with a new lady who moved here from America, but is Indian. She wears the black burqua covering of muslims. She said that she can't get use to people staring at her. I am surprised that she feels the stares. I mean, I get stared at all the time but I didn't think she would. She thought maybe it was because of the burqua. Then I came up with a good explanation. I said it is probably that they are trying to see if they know her, or maybe if she is their mom. She got a good laugh out of that.