Monday, October 21, 2013

How I Overcame Fear

I have anxiety issues.  It usually pokes it's head out when we are in the car.  I HATE Delhi traffic.  All the cars seem really close and it feels to me like we are going to just smash into the car next to us.  Sometimes we do.

This past week we went up to the mountain for some camping.  The road to get to the camp ground is windy and thin.  As you round a corner you must be sure you stay on your side of the road and really pay attention that the car/truck coming at you is also on their side of the road.  But if you want to go fast, you don't stay on your side of the road, you just go.  And there are no passing lanes.  If you want to pass (and you do want to pass every car that is ahead of you) you just do it, even if you can't see if there is a car coming.  The car you are passing is suppose to some how signal you that a car is coming.  Either the driver turns his blinker on or he puts his hand out the window.  This could also mean that it is safe to pass though, so you have to make sure you know what the driver of the other car is thinking.

The last time we made this trip up the mountain I swore I would never do it again.  But Micah's birthday happened to be during the school camping trip, so I went along.  We took a taxi up the mountain.  I tried a new strategy to deal with the fear and anxiety and it worked.

My new strategy is that I tell myself that I am going to die.  Most likely it will be a quick death.  Either a truck will ram into my side or we will roll of the edge of the mountain.  Therefore, I shouldn't be afraid.  You see, I'm not afraid of death.  And it worked!  That and having my eyes closed the whole way.

I decided to try my new trick again in another fearful situation.  I went rappelling.  I had to climb up a very challenging side of a rock ledge and get to the rappelling rope.  I went up pretty confidently, but when I got up to the top I realized it is actually pretty scary.  So I told myself, "I am most likely going to die so I should at least enjoy it without fear."  And again, it worked.  I had no problem stepping over the edge of the rock and rappelling down.  Who knows what else I will try.  Maybe bungee jumping.

1 comment:

Kim said...

My theory has always been that those who are suicidal have the most fun because they will do and try things that the "normal" person won't. There's a great country song called, "Live like you were dying." You might like it - I do.